Parachute Ad !

for sale : nice parachute, never opened, once used, slightly stained !

Marriage !!

"Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience."

Monday Blues

"Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life. "

Two Types Of Peoples Dominating Technology

Technology is dominated by two types of people:
- Those who understand what they do not manage.
- Those who manage what they do not understand.

Good Manners ?

Children are natural mimic who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

Which One ?

"Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one. "

First Law Of Shopping !

Matter cannot be created or destroyed, nor can it be returned without a receipt.

Unbreakable Toy !

"An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys."

Married Man Live Longer ?

"Its not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. "

Optimist Vs Pessimist

The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds and the pessimist fears this is true.

Managers !

Those who can -- do.
Those who can't -- teach.
Those who cannot teach -- manage.

Height Of Stupidity !

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them. :-)

Taxi Drivers ?

"If practice makes perfect, how do you explain the way taxi drivers drives ?"

Acquaintances.

Acquaintance are persons whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

Busiest People !

Ever notice that even the busiest people are never too busy to tell you just how busy they are.

Reason why people listen to you ?

When a woman is really listening to you, ask yourself "What does she want ?"
When a man is really listening to you, ask yourself "What has he done ?"

Business Meetings.

Only two words have ever accomplished anything in a business meeting. Those words are: meeting adjourned.

Anticipated Result .. huh ?

"No matter what the anticipated result, there will always be someone eager to
(a) misinterpret it,
(b) fake it, or
(c)believe it happened according to his own pet theory."

Rat Race.

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

If you wait ...

The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.